Tag Archives: single parents

Who Are You Supposed To Be?

By Jessica Rector

What does it mean to be yourself? How are you supposed to be or act? Like who you think you are, who others think you are, who you want to be, or how you want to be perceived?

How much of yourself are you showing to others? You go to work, don’t ruffle any feathers, and then leave. You don’t say too much and aren’t really seen. Your boss barely acknowledges you or knows your name. You try to fly under the radar. You can’t afford to lose this job and have to look for another one. So you don’t do or say too much…just enough to get by.

As you leave each day, you’re unhappy, unfulfilled, but don’t know how to change it or what to do. You think you do a great job at work. So what if you’re not the most talkative or most outgoing. If they knew you outside of work, you are great, but you feel like you’re not quite yourself at work. How can you be, when you feel like you’re walking on eggshells?

You just don’t want too much attention brought your way. Every time you walk through the doors of work, you feel like you’re opening the door to existing…a life of existing, and who wants to just exist?! You want t live. You want to be happy. You want to thrive. This job just isn’t your dream job. You always wanted to be a singer, writer, teacher, manager, or Vice President. You just didn’t want to do this. You had kids and now your career is stuck, stagnant, stale, and you just don’t know how to change it.

How can you tell your kids they can be or do anything if you’re not doing it? If you aren’t taking steps to do that for yourself? Your career isn’t done. Your life isn’t over, so start living it by doing what you want. So maybe it won’t happen to you tomorrow or even in a few months. If you take steps today toward it, it will definitely happen. You’ll start love going to work. You’ll be excited to do the job you’re meant to do.

I remember a Graduate School Professor saying to our class, when you find your calling, you will never feel like you are working. Something resonated with me so much when he said that. I just knew I would one day find what my purpose was, and then it would never feel like work–because I’d love doing it every day. What that looked like, I really didn’t know, but I knew that it could exist one day for me.

When you do find it, you won’t be asking how are you supposed to act or be or how you want others to perceive you. You will be liberated and free. You’ll be able to be completely who you are–goofy, introverted, outspoken, funny, or a leader. People will love you because you are being exactly who you’re supposed to be.

As a single mom and founder of The Single Mom Movement, Jessica Rector is determined to educate and empower single moms. Single motherhood affects everyone. You can Join The Movement, Become An Advocate, or Partner with Us. Do you feel isolated? CLICK HERE and never feel alone. Single moms CLICK HERE for FREE 50 Resources Every Single Mom Needs.

Why It’s Important to Take a Trip Without the Kids

By Jessica Rector

I leave my son in the care of my sister. I know he’s in good hands, but it still tugs at my heart. The floorboard to the room where he sleeps is creaky. From experience, I know when I go in to kiss him bye, he wakes up… and then doesn’t go back to sleep.

It’s really early, so I don’t want him to wake and stay up. To prevent that, I decide not to kiss him bye. As I sit in the airport waiting to board my flight, my heart tugs. Of course I miss him, but I’m also missing the forehead kisses I should have, could have, would have given him. I was being considerate not waking him, yet it tears at me that I didn’t do it. That dang creaky floorboard.

Sitting on the plane, I try to get my mind off of it by closing my eyes. A flight attendant comes over the intercom to say they are de-icing the plane, so we won’t take off for another 10 minutes. The guy across my aisle starts up a conversation with me. We chat a few minutes about where we live, kids, and work.

He asks what I’m doing in New York. I’m out of town for three days for a group business meeting. Then he asks what I do. I mention I own my own business, and the group I’m attending is amazing, because like single moms, entrepreneurs are some of the loneliest people. He says he’s an entrepreneur too so he understands.

I further explain how this group allows me to be around like minded entrepreneurs who are making a difference and are motivated and driven to grow their business in big ways. It will be exhilarating, exciting, and energizing. I’ll be rejuvenated and eager to implement strategies. He says it sounds like fun and a great group. As the conversation comes to an end, we begin take off, and I close my eyes.

I’ll be working, learning, and growing, but let’s be honest, it’s three days off from full-time single motherhood. That, my friend, feels like a vacation. In a job where there are no breaks, time outs, or “give me a few minutes.” Where the job is full-time, all the time, 24 hours a day every day, it feels good to be around adults. More importantly, it feels amazing to be able to make decisions about me and what I want to do or eat.

When you have kids, especially kids not in school yet, you are constantly thinking what do they want to do, play with, or eat, and you adjust your thoughts and behavior accordingly. So, to be able to think, “Hmmm, what sounds good tonight to eat? I can have a burger and fries and not have to make something separate for him,” sounds so ideal. You can go to the bathroom and not worry about a child at your leg, calling you, or whining. You can do your hair and makeup without rushing around like a chicken with your head cut off, because your child isn’t eating, getting dressed, or moving fast enough. You can actually think about you!

WWWWOOOOAAHHH, there’s a novel thought. To think about you! Yes, I love my son. But gosh darn it, I love a good vacation too, even when I’m not on the beach, exploring new cultures, or discovering fascinating parts of the city. When I have to get up earlier, stay out later, and work harder than I do at home, I still enjoy a vacation. Because let’s face it, there is nothing quite as spectacular (no matter how much we love our kids) as time to ourselves in any and every capacity we can get it.

I know it might not be the popular thing to say, but I also know you feel the same way. You love time without the kids, whether it’s running to the store, driving just about anywhere, or getting a root canal. There is no such thing as really running to the store anyways. If you have the kids with you, you wish you could just run in and out, and it takes two hours. If you don’t have kids with you and you could run in and out, you intentionally take two hours, because that’s your mini vacation for the month.

It’s not selfish, it’s a necessity. If you want to keep your wits about you and your easy going temperament, you MUST implement taking care of yourself. Part of self care is keeping your sanity. If you refuse to practice self care, you will get depressed or become easily angered. That’s not good, productive, or fun for anyone. But that won’t show itself all at once. You won’t go from Sunny Sunshine or Debbie Downer in a matter of a minute or even an hour. It will slowly creep up on you. You will start to get easily annoyed. Then that annoyance will turn into frustration, which will eventually turn into yelling about the simplest thing.

Think of it like this. Today when your child picks up his toys, they will look dishelved. You will be annoyed, but let it go. You still feel your annoyance when you’re cooking dinner. Then your child says he doesn’t like what you cooked. You slightly raise your voice saying, “You’re going to eat it anyways.” You’re now frustrated.

Then after dinner, you ask him about his homework. He says he doesn’t really have any. You look through his backpack and find a note from his school about an activity he was supposed to register for. The deadline was that day. As a single mom, you think, “Why am I the only one who has to deal with this?”

Then you scream to your son, “Jaaaaake come here.”

He comes to you and says in a sweet voice, “Mama, I’m here.”

Barely breathing, you continue yelling, “What is this? Why didn’t you tell me about this?

The deadline has passed. What were you thinking?”

He just stands there listening. When you finish, he says, “Mama, I’m sorry. Maybe you can call the school tomorrow and ask them if there’s any way we can still do it. If not, I understand.”You angrily scream, “Fine, go to your room.”

He walks off feeling defeated and sad saying one more time, “Mama, I’m sorry.”

Then you feel it hit you. You know you shouldn’t have gotten that mad. It isn’t even that big of a deal. Why did it hit you like this? You didn’t even feel that mad at first. One thought spiraled into another and into another.

It was a mistake. Just like you forget things, so does he. Registrations, school work, and homework are a lot for a kid to remember. On top of that, he does everything he can to try not to make you angry, because he knows he has to walk on eggshells around you. He never knows when you’ll be nice or mad and yelling. That’s even more for a kid to have to think about, ponder, and consider. That’s extra pressure on him, and no child needs to take care of his mom.

So five minutes here, five minutes there isn’t enough to keep your sanity. You need more. You need to take a long, long bath. Read a book. Take your mind off the hustle and bustle of everyday life. Let your imagination think of what you want to do, what you like, or where you see your future. Think of the man of your dreams and having the family you’ve always wanted.

Stroll the aisle at the stores, even though you aren’t buying anything on that aisle. Sit in your car just a little longer. Ask your dentist if you need to come back more often. Take advantage of every chance you get when you’re childless, because your every day comes too quickly when you’ll have the leg tugging, mommy calling, never-a-minute-to-yourself routine, and you’re going to wish you had a dentist appointment.

As a single mom and founder of The Single Mom Movement, Jessica Rector knows how single moms are overwhelmed, exhausted, and stressed. With targeted private coaching, programs, and school, she connects single moms to happiness, fulfillment, and empowerment by using her proven strategies. Clients praise Jessica for getting massive results after one session.

Being On Time Affects More Than Your Schedule

By Jessica Rector

I’ll admit, being on time was never my strength. I would always plan to leave on time, but something would come up (namely me thinking it wouldn’t take me so long to get ready, me “just” having to do something quickly, or sleeping just five more minutes which turned into 15). Then I’d end up leaving 15 minutes later than I planned. That was before I had a baby. So you can imagine how being a single mom to a newborn made that 20 times worse.

When my son was just two months old, we went to a football game. I planned on getting to the game after the first quarter. With a small baby, I didn’t want to be there the whole game. It was one disaster after another that morning, and I ended up getting to the game in the third quarter.

As my son got a little older, this changed. I figured out how long it would take me to get things together, then I’d tack on about 30 minutes extra…because you never know what could come up, a poopie diaper, his not eating quickly enough, or just a breakdown from things not going the way I expected (not that it happened often but you never know). I got better with being closer to on time, but still not quite on time…and you can’t definitely count out being early.

Then I went to a woman’s entrepreneur conference with the lady who is now my coach. At the conference, she said two things that really struck me. The first is, “How you do one thing is how you do everything.” The second is taking personal responsibility for yourself. It’s easy to blame others or things that come up and not take responsibility for our own actions.

I thought I was pretty good at holding myself accountable, until I heard her relate it to being late. When you are late, you don’t hold yourself accountable. What does that say about you not only to yourself but also to your clients? Being late isn’t respecting your time, others’ time, or what you have left to do in the day. In essence, when you’re late to something, it throws off your whole day.

One time, I was meeting a friend for lunch and a playdate. The weather was bad, and I had to drive 3 hours one way to meet her. Why I was driving three hours one way for lunch and a playdate, I wasn’t quite sure, but I had agreed to do it. I woke up late, so I left my house late. Then I ended up getting to lunch about 45 minutes late. She was staying in town, so she wasn’t at the restaurant that whole time waiting for me, but she was still somewhere waiting to meet me.

I had a phone meeting that I had timed perfectly for my drive back. Since I arrived late, the phone meeting ended up cutting into the playdate time. So when I left late that morning which was the very first thing of my day, it had a snowball effect. Everything else in my day was late as well.

After listening to what my coach said about being on time, I realized I don’t want people to think being late (or really being disrespectful of others) is how I do everything in my business, because it’s not, so I needed to hold myself accountable to that. I’m not only doing a disservice to others, I’m doing a disservice to myself. I have a duty to respect other people’s time and my time as well.

Although I’ve never been late to an appointment with a client, when you are, you can lose them as clients. They will think if you can’t even be on time with them, what else will you not do that’s expected or professional courtesy?

Now, I’m on time (and even early many times), because I know I owe it to myself, to respect my purpose, and to hold myself accountable. I also know that how I do one thing is how I do everything.

As a single mom and founder of The Single Mom Movement, Jessica Rector knows how single moms are overwhelmed, exhausted, and stressed. With targeted private coaching, programs, and school, she connects single moms to happiness, fulfillment, and empowerment by using her proven strategies. Clients praise Jessica for getting massive results after one session.

Show Up and Be Seen

By Jessica Rector

It’s so easy to get up in the morning and go through your day as though it’s routine. You’ve done the same things a million times, so it seems like it is. You get up, take a shower, eat breakfast, put on your makeup, do your hair, brush your teeth, and leave for work. Somewhere in between all of that, you make sure your kids are up, eating, getting dressed, and leaving when they should be. You could do this in your sleep. And some day you feel like you are.

When you get to work, have you ever thought, I’m just lucky to be here? If you’re like most single moms, that probably pops in your head once a week, if not more. You spend your day working on this and that, then you leave, get your kids, do something for dinner, and go through your nighttime routine. Wake up the next morning to do it all over again. You are going through your days sleepwalking through life. And you wonder where the last five years have gone?

Even when the weekend comes you are there but you aren’t really there. You are physically there, but you aren’t really all there. When was the last time you remember being ALL there? When you were still married or before you had kids?

Showing up means not just physically being present, but showing up emotionally, spiritually, and mentally. It means allowing yourself to be vulnerable so you can form a connection. Vulnerability is one of the hardest things to do. To let yourself stand in front of a crowd, even if it’s a crowd of one, and let yourself really be seen, flaws in all. To say, “I’m struggling,” “I wasn’t happy in my marriage,” “I thought my life would be different,” “How do I let go emotionally,” “I feel like no one gets it” is tough, but it’s also the best way to connect with someone else.

I know the difficulties, because I used to have tall, strong walls that I had put up over time around my heart so no one would hurt me. Then I found out, even that doesn’t always work. Pain and hurt will always ache, but the more walls I had up, the less connected I was to other people. The more I unknowingly held them at a distance.

I always thought when someone else was vulnerable it was courageous. It showed such strength, but in me, it demonstrated weakness. So I held my walls high and very proud.

When I was about to become a single mom at seven months pregnant, I came out about my pregnancy through a blog. My walls slowly crumbled around me. The more I shared with other women, I realized everyone knows a single mom. No one was judging me. No one was stereotyping me. That came from within me. I razed those walls and realized that when I allowed myself to be vulnerable with no walls, no bricks, no shield, and then stood with open arms saying, “This is me,” then and only then is when I started connecting with other people.

They saw me for who I was. That in turn allowed me to see who they really are. It’s this amazing and magical moment that happens when you put yourself out there. It’s as though you are standing on the edge of a cliff terrified that you will die, get made fun of, or people will laugh at you when you jump off. Then you decide to just go for it. You take a running leap off the ledge and what happens next you never expect.

Instead of people laughing, making fun of you, or you dying, you don’t even land in the water. Your wings take flight, and you soar higher than you ever dreamed possible.

But this can only happen when you allow yourself to show up and truly be seen. Be present in every capacity. Listen to an acquaintance and discover what is she really saying? Meet someone new. Tell a different story. Show up and make sure you are showing up as you. Not with the mask you wear, but you…who you really are. The woman who has a crazy family. The single mom who isn’t doing it all very well. The lady who doesn’t have it all figured out. The woman who needs help and support.

Show others who you really are and in return they will show you. Then the greatest gift will happen. You will connect, and your life will transform.

As a single mom and founder of The Single Mom Movement, Jessica Rector knows how single moms are overwhelmed, exhausted, and stressed. With targeted private coaching, programs, and school, she connects single moms to happiness, fulfillment, and empowerment by using her proven strategies. Clients praise Jessica for getting massive results after one session.

When Opportunities Arise

By Jessica Rector

You don’t really want to go tomorrow. You’ll have to get up early. You hate getting up early. You are already tired, and you know when you get up extra early, you’re going to be dragging all day. Maybe you’ll just sleep in and not go.

When tomorrow comes, and it’s time for you to wake up, you talk yourself out of doing it. You end up skipping the event and sleeping in. Then when you wake up, you think, I should have just gone.

You talked yourself out of going just because you didn’t want to wake up early. You told yourself you really didn’t need to go. Maybe you asked yourself what you would really get out of it, and then gave yourself the answer you wanted to hear in order to validate not going. Everything backed up your reasons for not wanting to go in the first place.

If you would have gone, you would have met an old friend, gotten a new client, or found an ally for a strategic alliance. If you would have gone, you would have planted to seed for something so much bigger and better to happen for yourself or your business down the road. Maybe you would have discovered a new hobby or a possible romantic relationship beginning. But you decided not to go.

You talked yourself out of the best thing that could have happened to you in a long time, because you didn’t want to get up early. You refused to mess with the routine you’ve set up for yourself each day. So maybe you would be more tired today. Or when you would have gone, you could be more energized throughout your day, because of one unexpected conversation.

That was a fantastic opportunity for you to step out of your comfort zone to get more business, to meet new people, and to build relationships. You turned it down because you were tired. You are saying another hour or two of sleep is more important than the possibility of your life catapulting to heights you never imagined possible. That’s what meeting one person can do for you, but you said, No, I’ll take another hour of sleep. I don’t want my life to be catapulted. I don’t want my life to be empowered. I don’t want my life to be fulfilled. I’d rather sleep a little longer.

There is plenty of time for sleep. There is plenty of time to be doing what you do every single day. You can stick to your routine when opportunities aren’t offered.

When they are, you need to be jumping up and down excited to go, ready to join, eager to see who you meet, and thrilled for the chance for advancement. Opportunities are the exact thing you need to Breathe Happiness. Be Fulfilled. Live Empowered! So when they come along, and they will, just say a resounding YES. YES, I’ll go. YES, I’ll get up early. YES, I’ll be there! They will change your life. And the more you say YES, the more opportunities will find you. So just say, YES, YES, YES and be prepared to step into your greatness!

As a single mom and founder of The Single Mom Movement, Jessica Rector knows how single moms are overwhelmed, exhausted, and stressed. With targeted private coaching, programs, and school, she connects single moms to happiness, fulfillment, and empowerment by using her proven strategies. Clients praise Jessica for getting massive results after one session.

Life Is Limitless

By Jessica Rector

I had a whirlwind weekend. I flew out to Los Angeles for a gala event supporting the Unstoppable Foundation, creating education around the world. It was literally a whirlwind. I left early Saturday morning for the event on Saturday night and returned Sunday. It’s a fantastic cause, so I didn’t want to miss it.On my return flight, I peer out the window, which is rare for me. I’ve flown several times, so the exhilaration of looking out doesn’t appeal to me much anymore, probably because I’m usually asleep.

Anyways, the sky is a bright, beautiful, blue, and all I see are endless clouds. I continue looking out the window, and I visualize myself on one of those clouds. Jumping up and down, bouncing from back to stomach, and cozying in as I lay on them, as though I’m enjoying being on cloud 9.

As far as I can see, it’s blue and while. Quite breathtaking… and limitless. It reminds me of life. We often look at things over and over never seeing anything different. After viewing the same thing for a while, we stop looking, because we know it’s going to be what we’ve seen countless times. It becomes less appealing.

Then for some reason, we are drawn to it once more, and this time something remarkable happens. We see something completely unfamiliar… something new and interesting. We realize those aren’t just clouds, they are the magic that spruces up our energy, adds life to a dull moment, or provides support when we desperately need it.

When you open your mind and your heart, you will see something different leading you to a new experience, which will take you down a different path creating the journey you’ve longed for. Your perspective changes, the light become brighter, and your hope becomes stronger. You realize life is limitless.

You create what you want. When you’re looking at the same thing over and over and keep seeing the same thing, take a step back. Stop looking for a minute. Quit focusing so hard, trying to figure it out or stressing yourself out trying to make it work. Once you walk away for a moment, and then revisit it, you’ll see a whole new world. Your perspective will change, becoming the positive force you want it to be.

Once you believe, truly believe, life is limitless, you’ll focus more on what you want than what you don’t want. Having a limitless life begins by stopping the limits you place on yourself. In other words, you’ll continue to think about how money is coming to you and not how you can’t afford something or how you are broke. You’ll say you have plenty of time and not that you have no time. Instead of saying you’re overwhelmed or stressed, focus on being relaxed and free.

These beliefs will change the rest of your life. You will create the energy within you and then you will begin to receive more money and have more time. You will be able to relax and be free.

Your life is limitless! See the same things differently. Change your perspective. Stop limiting beliefs. Focus on what you do want. Believe! Then you’ll Breathe Happiness. Be Fulfilled. Live Empowered!

As a single mom and founder of The Single Mom Movement, Jessica Rector knows how single moms are overwhelmed, exhausted, and stressed. With targeted private coaching, programs, and school, she connects single moms to happiness, fulfillment, and empowerment by using her proven strategies. Clients praise Jessica for getting massive results after one session.

What Is The Universe Telling You?

By Jessica Rector

Do you ever have those weeks? The kind where nothing seems to go right no matter what you do, and it’s only Wednesday? Monday doesn’t start off bad, and you would think it might, just because it’s the first day after the weekend. Then come Tuesday, and it all goes downhill and very quickly. The more you try to fix things, the faster it goes astray.

By the time you get to Wednesday, you are completely spent.These kind of weeks usually occur when nothing even really big happens. It could be you run late for something early in the morning, and then it throws off the rest of the day. Your internet keeps going in and out. So you call the internet company just to be on the phone with them for an hour and not resolving the issue.

Or maybe you’re on a deadline and you keep getting farther behind. You’re on the verge of tears, a meltdown, or a breakdown. At this point, you can’t tell which one. All you want to do is either sleep the day away, take a hot bath, or get a much needed massage. Unfortunately, you can’t do any of those.

What do you do when this happens? First, take a breath. When you’re worn out, frustrated, or annoyed, it’s easy to get completely wrapped up in the emotions. Then your mind shuts down, it’s almost as though your brain stops working properly. So take a deep, deep breath. Take a moment to regain your faculties.

Next, don’t panic. This is the easiest thing to do. You gut reaction is to panic, because things aren’t going according to plan. Think of all the things in your life that haven’t gone according to plan. Eventually, they’ve all worked themselves out, and this will too. Don’t panic about it, because like everything…this too shall pass.

You can do this. Even if things don’t go as planned, you can still be productive, because there are always things that need to be done. If it’s not going right today or something keeps you from doing what you need to do (internet being down, computer not working, something wasn’t delivered), think ahead a little. Do today what you would normally do tomorrow. Then tomorrow you can do what you wanted to get done today. Rearrange your schedule and make it work

Finally, listen carefully. What is God (the universe, spirit, whomever or whatever you believe) trying to tell you? We get so caught up in what we want, the way we want, when we want it, and how we want it, we forget that it’s not supposed to happen like that. That maybe you aren’t supposed to get that job, because a better one is coming your way. Maybe that relationship isn’t supposed to work out, because you are meant to meet someone so much more spectacular. Maybe you didn’t get it in time for your deadline, so someone would create it to look even better bringing in more clients.

Listen to what’s going on around you and what’s been told to you. If you don’t listen to the whispers, they become louder until they are bricks. When you realize this is how it’s supposed to be, you’ll be able to relax and enjoy the process. When things don’t go right, take a break, spend time with your kids, or do something fun. Get your mind off of it, so when you go back to it, you can think much clearer. Then it will all come to you.

And remember, this just adds a dimension to your story. It makes you more interesting. Something you endured, overcame, or thrived in spite of. Things were frustrating and you fought the battle and not only survived but thrived! When you think it’s too much, close your eyes, take a deep breath, and say, “I can do this,” and then you will!

As a single mom and founder of The Single Mom Movement, Jessica Rector knows how single moms are overwhelmed, exhausted, and stressed. With targeted private coaching, programs, and school, she connects single moms to happiness, fulfillment, and empowerment by using her proven strategies. Clients praise Jessica for getting massive results after one session.

Single Moms, What Is Your Worth?

By Jessica Rector

What is your worth? Quite often as single moms, we don’t receive the praise we deserve, the celebration we desire, or the acceptance we crave. All of those contribute to your sense of worth.

Do you preface what you say with, “Not to sound bad,” “If I were _______(smarter, more educated, etc),” or “I feel so fat?” You are doing a disservice to yourself by not giving yourself enough credit. You don’t know what the other person is thinking, so when you say, “Not to sound bad,” they may now think it does sound that way. Whereas before, it would have never occurred to them.

You are smart, educated, pretty, experienced, so don’t suggest to people you aren’t. You’re making a judgment on yourself that they most likely never thought about. None of us feel good all the time, but there is no need to feel fat in anything. If you don’t feel comfortable in something, then get rid of it. Don’t keep an outfit or shoes around that you feel blah about. If you love it, keep it. If it’s just okay, get rid of it. You only want to wear the stuff you feel good in, because it increases your self esteem (which increases your self worth) every time you wear it.

You are worth more than that. You deserve more than that. You are an amazing woman, and you matter. Don’t undervalue yourself. All the statements you use to preface what you’re about to say, undervalues you. It chips away at your self-esteem…over and over, until you don’t feel worthy.

It’s a defense mechanism we use, so we can say it before others do. I’ve caught myself doing the same thing before, “Oh my face is so broken out.” That way the other person doesn’t need to point it out to me. I’ve acknowledged it.

When the other person mentions it before we get a chance to do so, we are caught off guard and then feel defensive and extremely insecure. Many times we allow this one incident, this one comment to stay with us for the rest of the day. We think about it, ponder on it, and wonder if they are really right. In essence, we allow it to “ruin” our day. So we get to it first by mentioning it just to get it out of the way.

What we’re really doing is pointing out flaws, when others probably don’t see those at all or don’t see them as flaws. So stop prefacing what you want to say. If someone has a negative comment, smile to them, don’t dwell on it, and realize the comment is more about them than it is you.

I’ve learned to tell myself the same thing, That’s more about them than it is about me. Yes, I actually say it out loud to reiterate it to myself. It’s about their insecurities, uncertainties, and self-confidence. It’s their defense mechanism, so they don’t get hurt. When we let down our walls and be true to who we are, others are able to do the same. It takes one person to start though. When you take the first step to do that, it increases your self-confidence, which directly affects your self-worth. When you know you are worth more, you’ll stop prefacing your sentences with negative thoughts.

Everything you do, have, and accomplish in life is in direct proportion to your self-worth. If it’s low, get out there and talk to others. Be vulnerable. Be alive. Let down your guard. Others will see your true value, which will then increase your worth. Keep doing this time and time again, and before you know it, your self-worth will be exactly where it should be…where you deserve it to be.

Be around like minded individuals. When you surround yourself with Negative Nancys or Pessimistic Pollys, you start to think the same way. Get to know people who have the same interests, who want to succeed, or are energetic about life. You’ll feed off their positive outlook and energy. You’ll bond over commonalities. When you’re around like minded people, you’ll soar higher than you ever thought possible. Then it will become infectious. Others will want to be around you and you’ll be making a huge difference. Because you are worth it!

As a single mom and founder of The Single Mom Movement, Jessica Rector knows how single moms are overwhelmed, exhausted, and stressed. With targeted private coaching, programs, and school, she connects single moms to happiness, fulfillment, and empowerment by using her proven strategies. Clients praise Jessica for getting massive results after one session.